Other than “Las Vegas,” no other two-word combo is deserving of being suffixed with “baby” and an exclamation point than “draft day.”
Football reporting is a ratio of 1:352 — one game story to 352 stories about other things, such as match-ups, injuries, players’ parents. training routines, and so forth. Draft day — actually, the three days of the draft — is the ultimate wrap-up to the past college football season. It is the best and most detailed reporting of “other things.”
College coaches and their media-relation directors make sure there’s only a limited amount of information available. But when a player’s college career has ended, that’s when we learn how fast he really can sprint 40 yards, the length of his right arm and the span between his right index finger and his left index finger, and how he’d answer this Wonderlic question: A boy is 17 years old and his sister is twice as old. When he is 23 years old, what will be the age of his sister?
Rappers want to be players, and players want to be Good Morning, America co-hosts, and in the circle of life, fans want to be general managers. And if Brandin Cooks gets picked at No. 18, we all can say: “Yes, yes, we could see that during Hawaii’s game against Oregon State.”
Sure, there are the snooty types who claim they “have a life” and condemn their draftnik friends for wasting their time. The thing is, those snooty types will be the first to yell on the day of their fantasy-football draft: It’s draft day, baby!
Does this post make any sense? Probably not. That’s because I’m giddy. It’s draft day, baby!
Enjoy today’s first round, folks.